Where are you ? are you still listening my heartbeat??? Do u still feel the fragrance of my skin?? I don’t know whether I could see you again or not….why you came into my life? Why you spoiled me by giving your endless memories??
I don’t understand whether you have improvised the way i Express myself or I started communicating like you..all of sudden the sound of rain and earthy scent has broke the silence and she came out of thousands of memories ,unspoken feelings and unanswered questions and entered into the real world of emptiness….this rain has again refreshed the uncountable memories which she had spent with someone…Yes now he is “someone”.. weekend ,rain and a coffee in her hand,listening to the rain hitting the window and unignored memories that’s how she decided to spend her weekend…each drop of rain touching the ground gave her chills.she moved a bit closer to him and leaned her head against his shoulder and there existed only his warmth that touched her soul, which could rip her apart in the moment and put her together again..he no longer existed as a person in her life , he was a summation of her feelings, he was her happiness…she remembered that night when she asked him to sing a song for her and while riding a bike,he started to sing her heart skipped a beat. She was so complete.what better she could ask from life , a sweet kick of emotions and a pure feelings which was being attached to him slowly…
And she thought how good it would be if this all go on forever….
In between her memories she took a sip of coffee and realized that she could not make it, the way he made for her.this realization made her smile with the tears in her eyes.she was not able to understand why he has done this…
She could not forget the day when he admitted ;apart from her, there were a girl in his life and that girl could not live without him also he didn’t have guts to admit all these Infront of that girl.
She experienced a million of emotions that very moment.as she never shared her emotions Infront of him as they never thought of being together throughout their life as they were just spending some time to fill their empty life as there were no commitment asked by anyone as they just liked their company as they were more than friend and less than a couple as they both have had a relationship before as they never decided their future together……….
Because she never wanted to love someone else again.but it happened again,she didn’t understand why these feelings were all coming when they have never thought of being together. After one unsuccessful relationship she didn’t want anymore so she has decided not to be in a serious relationship anymore but again she was feeling the same….why???? She asked herself why I was feeling so bad if he wanted to leave her ..as we have never given commitment to each other as I never wanted to be in love again then why the hell these feelings are coming??? As this was the second Time she was feeling the same pain which she has felt before in her previous relationship.
Tears rolled down her cheek that very moment as she recollected herself and stopped herself by thinking all these meaningless thoughts…. she didn’t want to break their relationship. she didn’t want to be a home breaker because she knew the pain of heart break..she killed her every emotion and replied that she didn’t care whether he would stay or not ….she didn’t love him and if he wanted to leave her he could…by saying this she reassured herself, it’s a part of loving someone that sometime you have to give up your aspirations for them, while other times you have to give them up for your aspirations.
She wondered she could Tell him once “Without you in my arms,I feel an emptiness in my soul. I find myself searching the crowd for your face-I know it’s an impossibility, but I can’t help myself”.